Nice Folks (a joke I copied)

The other day I went to a local Christian bookstore and a saw a "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting; so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.

Boy, am I glad I did! What an uplifting experience followed! I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good he is ... and I didn't notice that the light had changed. It's a good thing that someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I would have never noticed!

I found that LOTS of people love Jesus!

Why, while I was sitting there, the guy behind me starting honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his car window and screamed, "For the love of God! Go! Jesus Christ, go!" What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!

Everyone started honking! I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all those loving people, I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love.

There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a "sunny beach"...

I saw another waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I asked my teenage grandson, in the back seat, what it meant. He said that it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something. Well, I never meet anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back.

My grandson burst out laughing ... why, even he was enjoying this religious experience.

A couple of people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed that the light had changed. I waved to all my sisters and brothers, grinning, and drove on through the intersection. I noticed I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again, and I felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all of the love we shared. So, I slowed the car down, leaned out the window, and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time and drove away.

Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!

Tooth Tunes

I was watching TV with the girls last night and saw a commercial for something I never would have imagined. Tooth Tunes, a musical toothbrush. It's timed to play two minutes of whatever song you choose so kids know how long they should brush for. What a cool idea, I thought. It would totally motivate a kid. But as I thought about it more and more, I changed my mind. What a horrible idea. The main problem in the design is that each toothbrush only plays one song. I can't come up with a song that I'd like to hear over and over every morning and every night. And I certainly can't pick one of the songs that's actually available.
The Beach Boys - Fun, Fun, Fun. Now I enjoy the Beach Boys quite a bit, but this is one of their more repetitive songs. No way I'd want to hear it twice a day.
Destiny's Child - Survivor. Who is buying their children music from Destiny's Child?
Kelly Clarkson - Walk Away: Hearing this song once is once too many.
Queen - We Will Rock You: Great song. But I don't think you could get a good brushing rhythm established to it.
Aly & AJ - Walking on Sunshine: This was a fun song in the 80s when Kristina and the Waves played it. Don't give me a second rate cover version.
Black Eyed Peas - Let's Get It Started: Please. Do you really want images of Fergie in your head when you're brushing your teeth?
Hilary Duff - Wake Up: OK, sort of appropriate for the morning brushing session. But has potential to cause insomnia if used at night.
Jamiroquai - Canned Heat: Much too funky.
Jesse McCartney - Beautiful Soul: I have no idea who this even is.
Kiss - Rock and Roll All Night: Somehow I just don't associate Kiss with good dental hygiene.
Smash Mouth - All Star: Probably the best choice. It will always remind you of the end of Shrek.
The Cheetah Girls - Shake a Tailfeather: In a word? No.
Theme from Rocky (Gonna Fly Now): This would be inspiring. I would want to attack my teeth. I'd probably end up eroding away the enamel.
The Village People - YMCA: How would I be able to brush my teeth AND make the Y-M-C-A hand signals at the same time?

Plus, the most aggravating part would be that every song would end at two minutes. So just when you're starting to enjoy it, poof, you're done. That's a recipe for an earworm of epic proportions. So in short, no thank you Tooth Tunes.